Our Wedding a Year Later
This is one of those times where I wonder where the days went. A year ago, Charles and I got married! I can’t believe how fast the time went. I’ll be honest, this year has been kind of shit. It’s not exactly what I had in mind for the start of our new happy little family together. We were thrown more than a couple of curveballs (as have most people) and it’s weighed on us. Still, at the end of the day, there’s no one I would rather be spending this time with.
I still think about our wedding as the best party I ever threw. It was a crowning achievement of mine in event planning. I didn’t talk too much about it because the days just flew on by after we got married and I started work, and then the holidays, and then a pandemic…you know, but it went off with limited hitches. I’m not sure I’ll ever forgive a bridesmaid for being three hours late or forgive myself for picking such a giant dress, but it was a perfect day. Thinking back, there are a few things I tell everyone who will listen to do, and a few that I wouldn't do again if you paid me.
Five things I’m glad we did:
I only spent money on things that would improve the guest experience
The big splurges? Food and booze. The idea for me was that I wanted this to be the best party, and I think it was. Y9ur guests won’t remember what the centerpieces looked like, but they’ll remember if the food was bad. We splurged big on making sure we got good food but kept the budget tight for most of the other stuff.
I made sure we didn’t go into debt on this one.
We were ballin’ a budget, and that meant cutting big corners. We didn’t have a lot of the “nice to haves” but I don’t think we missed them either. When I think about the wedding there isn’t a single thing I wish we had that we didn’t…I mean, beyond the frivolous stuff. A giant floral accent wall would have been cool.
I had a photoshoot with the photographer we hired before the wedding.
Getting to know the photographer we used at our engagement shoot was amazing! It made our actual wedding photography very relaxed and easy.
I got to prioritize time with my friends.
The morning of the wedding was pretty relaxing. We spent a lot of time doing not much besides hanging out with my friends in our secret bridal room.
I loved that we got to spend a ton of time outside.
I loved that most of our pictures and our ceremony got to be outside. We had the best possible weather, and it ended up being the perfect temperature to be outside most of the day and night.
Five things I would do differently:
I would cut the guest list and held the wedding in Montana.
We invited a lot of people. I would have cut that down to more like 50. I don’t think we gained much in terms of overall joy by having a large guest list. I also hated planning an out of state wedding. I would have had a smaller wedding closer to where we were living at the time. Maybe up in the mountains?
I would have gotten a simpler dress.
I loved my dress so much. It was big and poofy and made me feel like a princess. It was a hassle. It was hot. It took someone else to help me manage. I couldn’t pee unassisted. I wouldn't do that again. I’d get something a little less high maintenance,
I would have scheduled in a much longer honeymoon
We didn’t leave much time after our wedding to get settled before going back to work. We had a very nice few days in South Carolina, but I would have scheduled more time to get settled before I had to start work again.
I would have had a closer friend do the ceremony.
I liked the pastor who did the ceremony, but I felt like he didn’t know us well. He knew Charles from a long time ago and didn’t know me any. I would have picked a friend or relative to do it.
I would have DIY’d less and just paid the money.
We essentially paid zero professionals, beyond the DJ and the photographer. Everything else was on me. I designed and printed all the paper goods. The flowers. The favors. The outfits. The ceremony. All the decor pieces. Placecards…I did it all. I wouldn’t. I would just pay the money. I would have farmed a lot of stuff out to Etsy sellers or something and taken on much less myself.
One last thing — everyone told us to get a videographer or we’d regret it. We didn’t, saving around $4,000, and I have never once regretted that. I just know we wouldn’t watch it more than once. That is to say, you don’t have to follow any of the advice in these “what I would have done” lists. You gotta do what’s right for you and your family!
Tell me about your wedding…I love hearing about them!